Day 175: My miserable attempt at mud sledding.

This was one of the biggest firsts-gone-wrong for me.

After watching the movie “Charlie St. Cloud”, I have been very eager to experience mud sledding, and have tried to go the past few months. However, I could never find anyone who wanted to go with me! It seems that my once-adventurous friends have grown up. (I will probably be getting quite a few rebuttals to that statement, but I’ll take my chances:)

Today, with all the rain we got, I figured I would try one last time to round up some sledders. In the end, I found myself alone in my car, making my way to some hills, a pizza box on the seat next to me. Now, I know what you’re probably thinking. “A pizza box?” In my defense, I will tell you that I wasn’t thinking. When I think, I’m quite smart, but when I don’t think… well, let’s just say things can get ugly.

As I was driving, I realized that there might be people running on the trails where I was going, and it would be pretty embarrassing for them to see me sledding down a muddy hill on a pizza box by myself. I could just read their piteous thoughts: “That poor girl, what a weirdo, sledding on a pizza box in mud? And she doesn’t even have any friends!” I panicked for a second, wondering what I would say to passers-by, and then came to the conclusion that I wouldn’t have to say anything. No one would be running on the rainy, muddy trails.

Well, as my luck would have it, the car in front of me pulled into the parking lot. A dog jumped out of the car, followed by two men. I waited for a minute in my car, seeing what direction they were headed, thinking that I could wait until they were out of sight and hit the other side of the trails. But of course, they decide to just hang out in the field by the lot, throwing a ball for the mutt. I sighed and weighed my two options. I could either drive to some not as awesome, but decent hills I knew were on the other side of the trails and keep my dignity, or  I could get out here and say hello to them, while carrying my flattened pizza box across the field in the rain. This was a no- brainer for me. I chose the former and put my car back into drive.

A few minutes later I was sitting on my “sled” at the top of a grassy hill. A friend of mine who had gone mud sledding before had told me that you usually have to create your trail before it gets slippery and muddy, so I assumed that a grassy hill would work with a little patience. I pushed my body forward, waiting for gravity and the slippery grass to do their work. Nothing. Not even a slight slide. OK, I guess she wasn’t kidding about having to create your own trail! I started to push myself down the hill, slowly, my cardboard squeaking as it matted down the grass. I finally got to the bottom and looked back at my worn-down path. The good news was that I made it! The bad news was that my cardboard did not. I picked up the soggy box and realized that it would only last a few more runs and my grassy path would need more than a few runs to get muddy.

I made a quick decision. I would have to go to the hills that were already worn down to mud. I jogged the trails some and came to the steepest hill. It had a long, muddy path worn down the center of it. Perfect! I sat down on my box and pushed my body forward. Again, nothing. I was now getting frustrated. My sled was terrible! What was I thinking bringing a cardboard box? Cardboard softens and breaks! I’m so dumb! I was getting nowhere! And, I was going to miss the Bachelorette!

I tried a few more muddy hills, all unsuccessful. Aside from my first self-powered trip down the grassy hill, I had probably only sledded a total of 5 feet. That’s not even sledding! That’s sitting on a box and just happening to move a bit!

It was a long, embarrassing, defeated walk back to my car. This just might have been the biggest failed attempt my blog life has ever seen.

I blame my mud sledding failure on my friends and family. If I had had some other people with me, we might have actually had a sled made out of plastic to slide on, and we could’ve made a super muddy trail in no time at all. It is all your fault! ;)

But really, it was just pathetic. I fully intend to try mud sledding again. I will not be pathetic.

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